"I went in for competition diving in high school."
"I remember your first head-down dive."
"I went in for competition diving in high school."
John grinned. "Bet you looked good in one of
those diving suits."
"I was in great shape. Had to be, all those
gainers and swans off the three-meter board." Mike swallowed. "Just
before the dive, I'd say to myself, 'This is for Papa.' Later, I got
past that. When I finally understood what you'd done..."
John's face
lost its smile.
"I loved
you," Mike said. "I was happy when you were there. I was alone
when you left."
"I had
to leave - to survive. I loved your mother."
Mike laughed.
"Since when do queers love women?"
John winced.
"I was faithful to her until she locked me out of our bedroom - you
were five. She had a lover."
"Then
you switched to men."
"With
relish."
Mike's eyes
closed.
"I gave
up shame," John said. "Monogamy, too. Until I found Bruce."
He dragged his thumbnail across his forehead. "He died first."
"And
what about me?" Mike said.
"You
belonged to the straight life. I grieved over you. Then I gave up grieving."
Mike shook
his head. "So I was left on my own. Who taught me to play baseball?
Who taught me to defend myself? I had to learn on my own how to tie a
tie, to shave, to drive." Mike bit his lip. "Nobody told me
about sex. Nobody taught me to love women."
TOM'S TALES